Not Better......Different

OK.  So I'm sitting here typing out a blog before I go to work right?  Just as I'm about half way through, a power surge shuts down my computer. I lost about half of it but now I have to wait for the computer to re-start. I don't have time for this.  I have to get Dennis ready for school and finish getting me ready for work.  My time is precious!  Then I think to myself, are you serious.  Why is my time so precious?  Why is my time any more important than anyone else's?  I get so frustrated at people speeding down McCulloch into my kid's school zone. They pass on the shoulder.....IN A SCHOOL ZONE!!!!  That is because everyone thinks that their time is more important than mine.  They should not have to wait for me or anyone else.  I have always heard that, as a Christian, I should be different.  I should not be like everyone else.  Trust me, to those who know me, I am not like anyone else;  but not in the way I should have been.  I have no issues being different.  Why then is it that when you ask most folks about me, they will mention my sense of humor or my work ethic or my kids?  Not too many people would say, "man, that guy loves Jesus!"  Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with having any of those things, but I want to be known as someone that has a passion for people and serving Jesus.  I don't want to be "a better person"  I want to be DIFFERENT.

Goodbye to friends

Today I said goodbye to a family I admire very much.  Some friends of mine are going off to be missionaries in New Zealand.  I will miss them for several reasons.  Number one, God has worked through every member of this family to make me think, laugh and help me learn about myself.  Now when Michael first told me that he was thinking about moving to New Zealand, it was sad but not a shock. The more I got to know him over the years, the more I knew that his days in Pueblo West were numbered.  I knew that God would call him somewhere, but New Zealand?  Come on, what a cop out!  Missionaries go to Africa or China.  Someplace where they will suffer, right?!  Then I started reading about New Zealand.  Wow!  Geographically, I can think of worse places to go but spiritually, holy mackerel!  In fact, just a couple days ago I read an article on Fox News.com that listed New Zealand as one of the most non-churched countries in the world.  The headline read "Is Religion Dead?"  I know that they are going to have their work cut out for them but, I can't think of a family better suited for this task.  David, their oldest, is one of the most Godly teenage young men I have ever met.  Today he was showing me his new Bible and when he talks, you know this guy knows his stuff.  He is awesome.  As far as the rest of the family, words can't describe the example they have been to me.  I had the pleasure to teach Sunday school for Titus and Maddie for a while.  They always made me smile and were two of the reasons I continued to teach for longer than I had wanted to.  They are special kids, all three of them.  Then there is Nancy.  Nancy is an inspiration.  I can't imagine if my spouse came home and told me that they wanted to move out of the country and start a church.  Even with all her reservations, she allowed God to move in their lives and submitted.  Not many wives would do that.  She has always been an honest and caring person.  And I should mention that she always made me laugh (sometimes intentionally, sometimes not!)  Then there is Michael.  I can barely type this without tears coming to my eyes.  Michael has been there for me every time I needed him.  He loved me enough to say "I love you so I can say this."  You knew that meant "hold on, cause your probably not going to like this"  but he meant it.  If he loves you enough to say that, you are a very lucky person.  Michael taught me that God has worked through him to make me a better Christian.  Not once did he take one ounce of credit for himself.  I didn't always agree with him, but he would always respect my opinion and, when appropriate, point out in scripture why I was wrong.  He gave the best advice I have ever been given.  There is one reason and one reason only for that; Michael speaks with Bible scripture in his heart.  The greatest gift he gave me was a love for the word of God.  I wish I would have listened to him sooner but I finally got it.
I love and will miss every member of this family but I praise God for the work they will be doing in New Zealand.  If you get the chance go to www.graykiwis.com and show them some support.
One last thing......I will be praying for the people of New Zealand.  They have know idea what is coming their way.  The Grays are going to turn their world right side up!  I love you guys!

Trust through verification

One of my all time favorite movies is The Ten Commandments with Charlton Heston. I remember watching it as a kid many times. My so has recently been learning a lot of Old Testament Bible stories and he soaks them up like a sponge. I have so much fun listening to him tell me about them like he is teaching me for the first time. On a couple occasions he has stumped me with questions and facts I did not know. We always looked them up to confirm them together. Well, I come home from work yesterday to see The Ten Commandments DVD in front of the TV. I was so excited because I had been wanting to watch it with my son. I wanted to share something from my childhood with him. As we were watching it, he announced very matter of factly, that Moses' wife was black. He went on to be very descriptive of just how black she was. Now, this concerned me a bit because I had never heard that before. I disagreed with him but he was adamant that Moses' wife was indeed black. Now, I am not above learning something from my son and I am not altogether too concerned about what color Moses' wife was but, when it comes to Bible scripture, I want to know the facts. I asked my son where he heard this and he said that his Grandma had told him. This raised a couple red flags because she and I don't always agree theologically but his Grandma is pretty good with her Bible stories, so I just had to know. I started researching it online and found that in the King James translations, which has been found to be full of translational mistakes, it refers to Moses being married to an "Ethiopian." Thus the belief that he was married to a black woman. Now, on the face, that would be a logical assumption but, the Greeks used the word Ethiopia to represent the land of Cush. Cush is even described as far back as Genesis and, by the description would be in southern Iraq. Southern Iraq is a long way from Ethiopia and has an entirely different race of people. The New International Version and many other versions, describe Moses' wife as "a Cushite." The color of Moses' wife is not so much my point here. My point is, when it comes to your salvation and the validity of the Bible, never, never, never take someones word for it. Study, read and confirm what someone tells you about the Bible. You know what they say about opinions.......everybody has one and they all........well, you know. I repeat; trust through verification.

Boldness

For the next few weeks, I am studying Acts. This morning I was in chapters 3 & 4. I was struck by the boldness of the early church and the complete indifference of the Pharisees. One day Peter and John heal a crippled beggar. The Pharisees admit that they know a miracle has been performed and yet the best defense they could come up with was to tell Peter and John to stop talking about Jesus. Like if they would just shut up, this would all go away! Then, in chapter 4 verse 29, the people of the early church were led to pray for boldness, because of the Pharisees threats! Get threatened, speak louder! Man, I want that kind of heart. I think of martyrs and persecuted Christians all over the world. China, Burma, the Philippines, North Korea; persecution makes them stronger!!!! Why do we work so hard to avoid something that will make us stronger? I am tired of hiding.

Questions

How is it I can go to church, feel so convicted and then drive away and start leting things bother me? Today we talked about how a person that reads God's word and then does not do what it says is like a person that looks in a mirror and then walks away and forgets what they look like. So often, I feel like I forgot what I look like. It seems like the kids know the exact moment to start fighting or exact moment that a shrill scream will send chills up my spine. My wife knows the exact perfect thing to say or do to annoy me. Do I think they do it on purpose. No, not at all. Do I think the timing is due to my own weakness and the enemy trying to make sure that I don't keep walking on the path that God wants me on? Life is a struggle. Occasionally it seems like more than I can handle; although I know that "through God, I can do all things that strengthen me" and that He will never give me more than I can handle. Like at this very moment I would like some quiet contemplative time but I have a 3 year old and a 6 year old struggling to get my attention. Guess I will take the time and praise God that I have beautiful, healthy children and give them the time they need.

Finally, progress

It has been a long time since I blogged. I have really missed it. If you are reading my blog for the first time, please respond; I love to hear what people think!
I grew up going to church. My family was always active with our local congregation. After I left home in 1985 (that's right, almost 26 years ago!) I did not really attend church regularly until about 2000. Even then, I just went to church. I didn't study my Bible, I wasn't active in church and I still pretty much lived the same way I did when I did not go to church. Even in the last several years, while being active in my church and attending every Sunday, I still did not live the way I should with the consistancy that I should. On January 10th of this year, I started a bible reading program. Now, I had tried several reading programs and even tried to make some up on my own. I have never stuck with it. Even when I led a weekly Bible study in my church, I did not read daily. Well, I started this new program on Jan 10th and since then, I have read every day (except for a couple here and there) and in that time, I have read the entire New Testament and the Old Testament history books. This is a huge accomplishment to me. The strangest thing though is, it has changed my thought process. I looke back at my last blog from several months ago and can honestly say that things that I used to struggle with, are no longer such an issue for me. It still takes work, but I now have more self control than I have ever had in my life. It feels great! I am finally figuring out that life is a refining process and I need a lot of refining. I have allowed a lot of crap to come into my life. Now, like any refining process, I am trying to get the crap cleaned out. As soon as some junk surfaces, I scrape the scum off and start all over again. Just as I am foolish enough to believe that I am making headway, more crap surfaces and I have to deal with it and scrape the scum off the surface. It is a long, tedious and sometimes scary process. I don't always like it, but it is neessary and every time I confront an issue head on, with the help of God, I feel stronger every time. I recently had a major issue arise and I reacted to it with nothing but anger. I could not control it, so I may as well explode and yell at it! After praying about it and really meditating on the issue I heard voices. Yes, I said I heard voices! Now before you send for the guys in white coats and the electric shock therapy, they were good voices! One voice was God telling me that I had to have unconditional love. The other voice was that of a counselor that I had seen a while back. She said, you can't truly control another person so, decide what you are going to do if they aren't going to change. In other words, give unconditional love and it is what it is, so deal with it. Trust God to deal with the rest. So far so good. With the strength from God, it will only get better. See you next time.